Carnivorous plant jokes, let's hear 'em!

[D_muscipula]

I thought it would be fun to make a thread where members can create and share jokes about carnivorous plants. I got the idea after thinking one up earlier. I imagine this will be a challenging task, reserved for witty persons. Let's do this!

Here's my joke.
Q: What did the flytrap say to the waiter?
A: Uh, yes... I'll have a cheeseburger with flies.

 

[pearldiver]

A tad off topic, in Foresty school there was a bad joke about sand pine Pinus clausa in 'Floda.' Whomever asked about that species was told it had "sandy claws." Oft told around Christmas.

 

[Maiden]

Its not a 'real' joke, but last november, just the face my girlfriend had when she open the fridg. "Oh honey, forgot to say, i have my 22 vfts and my 15 sarra in dormancy in there, all the food is on the table"

The 3 big pots in black plastic bags take almost half of the space lol

 

[Exo]

What is a Drosera roramia's favorite drink?


Mountain Dew.

 

[Plant Planter]

Why can't a Pinguicula bake anything?
'Cause all its butter got warts.

 

[scottychaos]

 

[D_muscipula]

Nice!
Okay, here's are some I came up with.

Q: What did the spider say to the flytrap?
A: Are you gonna finish that?

Q: Why was the flytrap quick to snap?
A: It was on it's period. xD

 

[Plant Planter]

Why do Nepenthes plants play major league baseball?
'Cause they're pitcher plants!

 

[Plant Planter]

What do you call a Drosera's male child?
A son dew!

 

[mylesG]

Q: Why was the flytrap quick to snap?
A: It was on it's period. xD

 

[mcmcnair]

Maybe not a CP joke but more of a horticulture joke...

I'm sure you've heard the saying "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink"...
Well, you can lead a hor-ti-culture but you can't make her think.

No offense to the ladies on here, just a joke my professors tell.

 

[Wire Man]

And now for Sonata in S. minor.

 

[That One Guy]

Wire, I uhh...don't get it.

 

[Wire Man]

Minor key. It's a music joke.

 

[That One Guy]

Oooooohhhh...haha thanks.

 

[lil hokie]

Maybe not a CP joke but more of a horticulture joke...

I'm sure you've heard the saying "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink"...
Well, you can lead a hor-ti-culture but you can't make her think.

No offense to the ladies on here, just a joke my professors tell.

Booooo

 

[JMN16150]

Time for casting Snakes On A Plane 2!

First audition : Cobra Lily

 

[JMN16150]

Cobra Lily fails so it tries to audition as Voldemort's evil pet

 

[Plant Planter]

Venus-fly trap: The only plant able to eat extraterrestrial insects.

Forget just Nepenthes playing in major league baseball. Why can all carnivorous plants play major league baseball?
'Cause they're great at catching flies!
(I can't believe no one used that joke already.)

 

[Presto]

A Sarracenia walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Sorry, but we don't serve minors."