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Florida Freeze and free cat to a bad home

For those of us living in Florida. Tempratures actually dropped enough that I know I brought my plants inside to protect them from the cold weather. All my drosera, neps ,sarrcenia, and Utricularia. I put them in a seperate room closed the door and let them be. That was the plan until the freeze was over, which meant this morning I would put them back outside. Well someone I won't mention who (my wife, oops) left the door open last night.

Now for the painful part. Many of my utricularia were recoving from the windstrom that had decimated them about a month ago, some were making progress.

Now the door does not have barbed wire or electric fencing around it. An idea I consider reasonable right now. And one of my four cats (cat's name: Roadkill <--really it's name) I saw this morning come out of the room into the kitchen and promptly proceed to throw up. i hope it hurt you nice guy I freaked the vomit had plant particles and my door was open.

Roadkill left no plant unmolested hanging neps were even fair game. Let's just say that my collection right now is back to a beginner level and I am considering amputation of all 4 of my cats paws. Although it is probably natural for the cat, I share blame to the party that left the door open. So while I may have to do it as a combo pack because I certainly can't get rid of just one. I am thinking free cat and wife to a bad home. Maybe ebay.

In the aftermath. My cat completly ate 5 drosera , 2 sarccenia, 12 Utricularia, and chewed on 6 neps at least 3 are in really bad shape. And I think the cat drank the water my U. gibba was in.

I am going to try those breathing exercises to calm down because I could end up with the police , animal abuse cops, and the local news station at my house if I don't.

There is a line in the orginal Heavy Metal movie that goes something like this: dying is to good for him(them in this case), they should be torn into little itty bitty pieces and buried alive.

I don't condone abuse (human or animal) but I understand it right now.

Sincerely,
Brendhan

PS. I am being censored by the software for the board. I was referring to my cats questionable parentage in the italics comment. I did not refer to it as a nice guy. I would like to remind the mods that I come from a long line of disgruntaled postal workers, and I am off my meds. Censoring doesn't help my mood. Now where is my howitzer?
 
Howitzer?? Your dresser, top drawer, left side. Happy obliterating!
 
Cats are just indoor squirrels ! Only squirrels don't *rap and puke on your floor to step in when you get up in morning. One question that I think I know the answer to already but are the cats yours or your wifes ? Second question did you get your wife a GOOD Valentines present ? (Dews and Neps don't count and don't ask how I know)
 
[b said:
Quote[/b] (Bugweed @ Feb. 14 2006,2:13)]Howitzer?? Your dresser, top drawer, left side. Happy obliterating!
Thanks found it.
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Sincerely,
Brendhan
 
[b said:
Quote[/b] (droseraguy @ Feb. 14 2006,2:34)]Cats are just indoor squirrels ! Only squirrels don't *rap and puke on your floor to step in when you get up in morning. One question that I think I know the answer to already but are the cats yours or your wifes ? Second question did you get your wife a GOOD Valentines present ? (Dews and Neps don't count and don't ask how I know)
Actually I have a bit more understanding for the cat than I do for the wife, in this case. The cats are actually a mutual item. I brought in two after we started dating, she brought in two. No I did not get my wife a valentine's present. I consider valentines day the equivelent of National prostitution day by the retail industry. I do not buy cards , gifts or other hooey just because the industry tells me I should. Also I expect big presents on my anniversary as a sign that I managed to put up with her for the past year.

Today my wife's new lawn mower arrived so she can mow the yard again. Lost the last one in the hurricane. Does that count?

Sincerely,
Brendhan
 
thats to bad. i dont have cats cause im severly allergic. living out in the country ive had to dispatch a few feral cats. unfortunatly the most recent one, i think was dropped off by an owner who no longer wanted it and is extreamly friendly so i am attempting to find it a home. i figure if they run from me they are fair game, and fall under the "varmit" heading along with the dang veggie garden destroying ground squirrels. unfortunatly(or fortunatly depending on how yah look at it) i dont like the idea of killing someones pet and have been looking for greener pastures for her.
 
[b said:
Quote[/b] ]National prostitution day

hey it aint prostitution if she is your wife
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, its just a reminder to do something for her..........not that it usually helps my memory anyway
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i just traded for a new rifle. i made the mistake of showing it to the wife, now ive got to find me another one as she decided it was her new rifle. does that count as a valentines day present?
 
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Kill the kitty!.....Kill the KITTY!!


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Sorry to hear about your cat.....no wait I should save that heading for a few days from now.

Moving on ....I feel your pain, my roommate has a very old cat that I must fend off from my plants constantly. It's so old though it could potentially "run off somewhere to die", and completely dissapear. I could live with that.

As for the wife part, I don't currently have one but, but I'd be OK if the ex shared the same fate as the cat. I'd feel bad for my girls, but I do think they'd be better off.
 
  • #10
I guess yer both in trouble then. I look at it this way. My plants are my babies that she has nothing to do with and I like it that way. When somethings dead I know who to blame ! And the Valentines present is ususally something not too expensive and simple. She knows where I live, sleep and keep all my cool stuff, besides I always have clean clothes and food. Understudy I think your lawnmower gift was just what she was looking for ! I'll bet she can't wait for you to put stuff back outside this spring. lol
 
  • #11
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No actual cats were harmed in the making of this image.....maybe.

Sincerely,
Brendhan
 
  • #12
Hey man, look at the bright side - you get to replace all you lost plants with the most expensive versions of them you can find, and your wife can say ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about it!

You, my friend, have some guilt that you can milk!

As for the cat problem, I solved mine (when it was an issue, hasn't been since we've moved) by getting a 4'x2' "scat cat mat." They look like big seedling heat mats, but they're "electric fenses." Work great for keeping cats/other varmints (wives, lol) off any surfaces they don't belong on.
 
  • #13
1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.

2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid.

4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power-wash" and rinse".

6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.

9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.


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  • #14
You guys are too funny, I can hardly stop laughing.
 
  • #16
Guess I should also post the reaction from the dog
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