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i overdosed

PlantAKiss

Moderator Schmoderator Fluorescent fluorite, Engl
Joined
Aug 25, 2001
Messages
10,335
Location
Richmond, Virginia/Zone 7
Yup...no denying recovery is a tough road to walk. As hard as it is and as much as you DON'T want to do it, not doing this will bring you more grief in the future than you can imagine. To continue on the path of an addict will spell disaster sooner or later. There's never a happy outcome...

That's great that you are doing this. Time will make it better so hang through this sucky part. I think if you talk to any ex-addict, they'll tell you its the best thing they ever did for THEMSELVES.

Good luck and keep us updated. We are all behind you!
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Joined
May 30, 2004
Messages
824
Location
Massachusetts, USA
You've been a very positive force in these forums and I hope things work out. You've already cleared the most difficult hurdles--admitting to yourself and others that something was wrong and taking real steps to getting better. It takes a lot of courage and maturity to do these things and I wish you all the best.
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Joined
Aug 6, 2004
Messages
668
Location
so. cal.
I don't know what I could add that others haven't already said. Having had a similar problem and now clean over 5 years I can tell you that getting a sponsor and following his suggestions has helped me immensely. Don't believe the lie the drug is telling you - One more time only leads to one more time and one more time that could be your LAST time. Sorry if I sound too preachy. NA is a good place to be. It takes time and it gets better. Feel free to contact me privately if you wish.

Don't quit before the miracle happens.
 

nepenthes gracilis

Nepenthes Specialist
Joined
Sep 7, 2001
Messages
6,341
Location
Alexandria Bay, NY Z-5a
You can do it. You're a good person, just under the wrong influences!

Which brings me to another question....I have a good friend that likes to smoke....well you know. I'm not really for or against the stuff but would like her to quit...does anyone have any advice for me? I'm not trying to play big brother, but more like caring friend....I'd like to see her with half a brain at least in the coming years, rather than burn them up on the bowl.

Any help appreciated...PM me if desired.

Thank you
 

seedjar

Let's positive thinking!
Joined
Dec 11, 2004
Messages
4,067
Location
Olympia, Washington
It takes a lot of guts to do what you did, Clint, especially at your age. You should be proud of yourself. I know it's cliché, but admitting to your problem is the biggest part of the solution; at least now you are being honest with yourself and others about what's going on. It's scary to have a problem that you can't tell others about - I've watched a lot of people waste away from trying to bear those kinds of burdens on their own. From here on out all you have to do is make the choices that you already know are right. The first thing they tell all my friends that go through addiction treatments when they're released is, "Find a hobby!" Lucky you, you've already got your plants (and us, for what it's worth!) We all know you can beat this, and we're here to help, too.
NG, it isn't exactly clear to me what's going on from the context of your message. Is your friend just using recreationally, or has it become a problem in her life? Drugs are a slippery slope; just like with alcohol, there are plenty of people who use irresponsibly for fun, and we may not like how they act when they do so, but there's not a lot that you can do to change a person just to suit your aesthetic. I'm personally pro-legalization, but I have had friends who really screwed their lives up on the stuff and I give them a hard time about using. They, beyond just acting stupid, dangerous or annoying when under the influence, turn into total flakes while using, both when high and sober, because their drugs of choice become so central to their everyday life. It's destructive, and therein lies a crucial difference.
You need to get into your friend's head a little and try to understand why she's using. Some people self-medicate, some people use for fun, and others to escape. Most people do a mix of all three. Whether her reasons are justified and responsible is a matter of your opinion, but you do need to assess the situation fairly, as her friend. If it's the case that you just don't enjoy being around her when she's high and it's not really affecting her success or wellbeing, then you should just explain to her in a nonaccusitory manner that you would prefer to spend your time with her when she's sober and that she should find other things to do when she's high. But if something serious is going on - she's using in order to ignore her responsibilities or some emotional trauma, or her habit is getting in the way of her life - then you need to confront her.
Everyone is different in the way that they respond best (or least bad) to a confrontation about how they run their life. Usually it's best to do things in an intervention-type situation, but it's not always necessary. Basically, you need to present the situation as it appears to you, and explain to your friend why her habits concern you. Try not to be angry or accusitory, and make sure to listen. Most people who have been way out of line will try to make excuses and play things off, but there are some situations where they might actually offer some insight into their situation in response to your concern, so you have to break out the ol' BS detector and pay close attention. Hopefully, your friend will be in a reasonable state of mind and you won't have to butt heads about it. However, you will need to be ready to call her on things if she starts to get out of line - that's where having other people around can help.
Finally, you need to be prepared for the worst case, which is that she is in a bad situation and you can't do anything to change it. People headed for the bottom will pull you down with them, and they'll pull hard. Sometimes the best way to be a friend is to stand aside and let nature take its course. It's not easy to watch a friend hurt themself, but the only way that they'll change their behavior is if they realize that something is wrong. Some people just don't listen to good advice; they have to find out the hard way.
NG, feel free to PM me if you'd like to discuss this in detail. Clint too, for that matter.
Rock on guys.
~Joe
 
Joined
Mar 11, 2005
Messages
836
Location
Evanston, IL
best of luck. it's hard to quit things you enjoy. and let me tell you...if you want to wait for god or jesus to help you..make sure you don't hold your breath whilst waiting. The only person who can help you is you..and since you were strong enought to admit there was a problem..you are strong enough. supportive family and friends are a bonus, and it looks like you have that going for you. I know it will be hard, but I know you will come out ok. April
 
Joined
Sep 12, 2004
Messages
455
Location
Zone 9
JLAP, just make yourself go with the right decision every time and you'll be glad afterwards. Taking the easy route never made anyone happy.

April, please don't be saying what God can or can't do until you've honestly sought after himself.

Peter
 

Est

War. War never changes.
Staff member
Moderator
Joined
Apr 18, 2004
Messages
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Location
Pasadena, CA
[b said:
Quote[/b] ]April, please don't be saying what God can or can't do until you've honestly sought after himself.

To avoid this getting off topic: I believe the message was DON'T wait for God, Jesus, or anyone else to do it FOR you or to initiate things that must be done by yourself. I'm not trying to put words in anyones mouth or anything, just saying it as I read it, and hopefully preventing a massive splurge of posts where the point of the thread has been lost sight of.

Back the point; Good luck, Clint. As you can see, you've got all of us cheerin' for ya!
 
Joined
Jul 5, 2005
Messages
83
Location
Beaverton, OR
You'll get through this and be fine, thanks for inspiring me with your courage to post that you have such a problem!

ps Est: thanks for jumping on that landmine
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