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Nepenthes pollen question

I don't know why but my one nepenthes that first flowered the pollen was very powdery. The next male it was very hard, once I found out I had a female I had to crush the pollen up and grind it with a spoon. The original male just flowered again but the first to open up and it's hard again. I've attached a picture, it's seemed to work because I have a successful pollination and have 5 other stalks on the same plant so hoping to get a lot of babies. Just peculiar why the pollen is so different. Trying to pollinate by flower it just doesn't rub off.
 

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Either you're not waiting long enough for the anthers to actually release pollen (a solid yellow head is just closed anthers with no pollen available), or there's something off in your conditions that is causing dud flowers with bad pollen production/ripening (would be up to you to figure out what they might be unhappy with). The pollen texture doesn't change, whether it's being viably released does, and only flowers that are actually releasing the pollen are usually going to have any decent viability to them. If there's not removable powder, it's not worth messing with.
 
Either you're not waiting long enough for the anthers to actually release pollen (a solid yellow head is just closed anthers with no pollen available), or there's something off in your conditions that is causing dud flowers with bad pollen production/ripening (would be up to you to figure out what they might be unhappy with). The pollen texture doesn't change, whether it's being viably released does, and only flowers that are actually releasing the pollen are usually going to have any decent viability to them. If there's not removable powder, it's not worth messing with.
Except I've already had successful pollination as the female pods have swelled and elongated hence my confusion.
 
You can't be certain of success until you see viable seeds. Plenty of females start developing larger pods without viable pollination occurring, or pods may swell from one or two successful grains being present but not being overall viable.
 
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