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Got any words of advice?

  • Thread starter Trapper7
  • Start date

Trapper7

Loves VFT's!
So I just broke up with my boyfriend. I don't even know why I'm posting this here. We were together for 5 months. He was a good guy, but he was hurtful, emotionally. I didn't want to be hurt anymore. I'm really upset. I'm not sure what to do now. Everything I see reminds me of him. How do you deal with this sort of thing? I already miss him
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Do something constructive. Grow CP. Why would you even care about someone who hurt you anyway. If there were any feelings from him at all, he wouldn't do that to someone. 'Specially you.
 
I gave up all my cp's. They died, so they're gone. I don't know why I cared about him, but all I know is that I still do. Those feelings don't just go away. I don't know what to do or what to think. I really don't know why I'm posting this. I guess I just needed to vent...
 
My CPs are one thing that have always been there for me. I'd never turn my back on them. My kid is over 4 months old now, and I'm still growing strong! Unlike some of you said
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I'm happy for you. I thought about you and wondered about Laurel. I'm glad you're happy. I didn't turn my back on my cp's, they turned their back on me... they died. "Unlike some of you said" I don't know what to say to that, except that I know what you're talking about... Sorry
 
You don't know what to say but know what i'm talking about? I'm just refering to how people said as my kid came- my plants would get the back seat. And from my view with the new green house and all they are doing very well
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What is it you are refering to??
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Nothing, forget it. As I recall we aren't allowed to discuss personal issues on the board. Congrats on your baby and your greenhouse.
 
Just put your head down, and put one foot in front of the other, do what you need to do to keep body and soul together, and go on. Go out with friends. Every day, it gets a smidge easier. That's all I can say, because it's worked for me.
 
Well, I think you are too insecure. Since when did any woman need a man for anything except to make babies? Woman are tough. Much tougher than men like to give them credit for. But to lose yourself in a hurtful idiot is just insane. Stand up for crying out loud, and grow up. Mind your business, and let the next one come as it happens. Probably best this fellow left. What would be next beside verbal abuse? Physical abuse? You want that? If that's the case, don't bother writing and crying here. Your best help is from yourself. You did fine without him before you met him, you can do the same now.
 
  • #10
Hey Trapper7, that's all perfectly normal. Once you have feelings for someone, they are hard to let go of. No "breakups" are easy or smooth. And frankly, there's nothing we can say to make it better except that when all is said and done, we'll still be here growing CPs and chatting on this silly forum. Nothing makes the pain of these things go away except TIME. There will be a time in the future when it seems like it's no big deal and that it was good riddance. But there's really nothing that can make that happen right this minute. I'd pop on the TV, make a cup of tea, and just sit back and let it happen for awhile.

Capslock
 
  • #11
Oh, and be kind to yourself.
 
  • #12
[b said:
Quote[/b] (Bugweed @ Jan. 17 2006,10:43)]Well, I think you are too insecure. Since when did any woman need a man for anything except to make babies? Woman are tough. Much tougher than men like to give them credit for. But to lose yourself in a hurtful idiot is just insane. Stand up for crying out loud, and grow up. Mind your business, and let the next one come as it happens. Probably best this fellow left. What would be next beside verbal abuse? Physical abuse? You want that? If that's the case, don't bother writing and crying here. Your best help is from yourself. You did fine without him before you met him, you can do the same now.
You're right, I am very insecure. I am grown up, but it still hurts. I just did this a bit over an hour ago, so it's still very fresh in my head.
 
  • #13
Thanks Capslock and aprilh.
 
  • #14
Some good advice here.

What you need to do now is hang out with friends, family and rebuild your own persona. Become independently stabilized and self-confident. Enjoy the single life and stay away from the troublesome guys
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I believe that God has one person out there for everyone. This person was not the one! So remember that God has better things instore for you and treat this as an event that had to happen in order for them to come.

Don't forget that there is someone out there who loves you unconditionally and wants to be a part of your life. Invite Him into your heart and share with Him what is going on with your life. He will always be there for you. If you're not sure where to find him a good place to start is in the Book of John in the New Testament. There he awaits you.

Love, Godbless, and Goodluck. We're here for you!
 
  • #15
I appreciate that, but what if I don't believe in him? Sorry.
 
  • #16
First off my 2 cents worth, if he was being hurtful emotionaly thats just as bad as if he was hurting you phisicaly. My oldest daughter split up recently from a almost 5 yr relationship and yes at first the "WIND BAG AIR HEAD" that what we called him was just emotionaly abusive then it turned phisical and that was enough and my oldest had a very hard time getting outa that relationship but finaly she had had enough and of course I STEPED IN more than once but finaly after they split up yes she would cry, yes she would be hurt and lonely but she had her work to go to and animals to care for and started going out with friends and having fun and thats when she realized she DID the RIGHT THING.... Yes it sometimes can be very hard to deal with a breakup but life goes on and there is better fish in the sea and you need to tell yourself everyday im better than that and i deserve MUCH better than what i let go..
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Sit down, take a deep breath and chin up and smile on your face and say to your self "Im strong & Nothing is gona make me feel like crap again!"
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You go girlfriend good for you for kicking him to the curb!!!!!!!!!
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  • #17
Niki,

Good for you for ending it when you did. He would have only gotten worse as time went on.
Keep your mind busy. Make a cake, build an igloo, just do something to keep busy. Drive to Boer and take all yer emotions out on them, take 2 neps, and restart your cp collection.
 
  • #18
[b said:
Quote[/b] ]I appreciate that, but what if I don't believe in him? Sorry.

Your loss. But I guess any further discussion would be breaking rules and would have to be carried out by PM.

Personally I'd say something but the only advice I can give is what you already rejected.

Cheers all the same,
Peter
 
  • #19
No loss. Just a mistake. But she can make her own choices. That is what free will is for. Leave her be.
 
  • #20
[b said:
Quote[/b] (*Barracuda_45* @ Jan. 18 2006,12:33)]First off my 2 cents worth, if he was being hurtful emotionaly thats just as bad as if he was hurting you phisicaly. My oldest daughter split up recently from a almost 5 yr relationship and yes at first the "WIND BAG AIR HEAD" that what we called him was just emotionaly abusive then it turned phisical and that was enough and my oldest had a very hard time getting outa that relationship but finaly she had had enough and of course I STEPED IN more than once but finaly after they split up yes she would cry, yes she would be hurt and lonely but she had her work to go to and animals to care for and started going out with friends and having fun and thats when she realized she DID the RIGHT THING.... Yes it sometimes can be very hard to deal with a breakup but life goes on and there is better fish in the sea and you need to tell yourself everyday im better than that and i deserve MUCH better than what i let go..
smile_m_32.gif
Sit down, take a deep breath and chin up and smile on your face and say to your self "Im strong & Nothing is gona make me feel like crap again!"
smile.gif
You go girlfriend good for you for kicking him to the curb!!!!!!!!!
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Thank you. I used to be in an abussive relationship...but this one hurts more actually. I think that mental pain is worse than physical pain...especially the pain I have in my heart right now. I know it will be better, but I can't help but feel like crap right now. I can't seem to attract nice guys, only abusive ones. I actually have no one to go out with, friends wise I mean. So that is out of the question. I do however have a job to go to and my animals to care for. It's just really bad, cause I lost my three ferrets about 2 months ago. All three got a very rare disease...but anyways, it was him that I went to crying my eyes out, and it was him that comforted me. My dog got hit by a car a couple weeks ago, he lived, but it was again him that I ran to, and again it was him that held me and told me it was gonna be alright. He wasn't always mean, just sometimes. Sorry, nevermind. Thanks again.
 
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